Garbage Mail/Cat Litter Crackerjacks: That Thar Idea Is Free

Evil Monkey:Jeff! You've come back to the land of the living. Man, I forgot how ugly you are.Jeff:Same here.Evil Monkey:Did you do anything other than write the novel during that time?Jeff:I also wrote a couple of book reviews, did a few Amazon posts. But mostly I was completely isolated and off the internet. Which really helped focus my thinking.Evil Monkey:In a kind of philosophical way?Jeff:You could say that.Evil Monkey:Come to any conclusions?Jeff:I had a couple of ideas. Came to me out of the blue. I think they'll be pretty lucrative.Evil Monkey:Lay 'em on me. C'mon, give it to me. I can take it.Jeff:Well, the first one is garbage mail.Evil Monkey:Garbage mail? What the f---?!Jeff:Yeah. I kept hearing the garbage truck outside and thought about the high cost of postage. And then I thought maybe we should institute a really cheap garbage mail service. Put your outgoing mail that's local on top of the trash in the trashcan. In a plastic baggie. The garbage men deliver it to the recipient's garbage can--at a fraction of the cost of "normal" snail mail.Evil Monkey:You're gettin' uglier by the minute, dude.Jeff:And then I kept hearing the cats using the kitty litter box, and I thought, a lot of the time the kids in a household have to clean the cat box. What better way to motivate them than "kitty crackerjacks". Little prizes that the parents hide in the litter box, in some kind of protective plastic bubble that crap and piss can't stick to. So it gives the kids an incentive to clean the cat box.Evil Monkey:This is what you were thinking about while working on the novel?Jeff:Only a little bit of the time.Evil Monkey:Only a little bit...Jeff:Yeah. Why?Evil Monkey:Now, for some reason, I have an image of your novel printed out on your editor's desk. She's passed out on the floor, overwhelmed by the sheer suckage.